Accountability

Discipline?
Accountability?
Consequences?

Ah. I've been thinking a lot about discipline lately. I think deep down I've always known it was an issue. When it comes to a situation where other people are in charge I think I'm good. I mean when I work for someone else or even when I was in school (pre college days) I'm sure I do what I'm supposed to and I do it with a sense of urgency and importance. When I'm the one in charge of myself...well that's where my problems are. I think I remember being in high school and teachers warning us that once we're in college the teachers aren't going to put in the extra effort to make sure we get our work done. It will be up to us. We have to take the initiative to do what we need to do. It's our responsibility, no one else's. I've always been a procrastinator though, even in high school. I'm not even sure how I made it through seeing as how I always waited until the last minute to read the assigned books...if I read them at all. I was also that kid finishing up a paper minutes before it was time for bed the night before it was due. I guess I was lucky. I mean I didn't make exceptional grades and sometimes I wonder how much better they would have been if I would have had more discipline. I remember it always felt like a struggle though, just to get average grades. I remember being jealous of my sister who also waited until the last minute but got perfect grades. I remember complaining that I had to work my butt of to get those average grades. Looking back on it now, in a way, I did work my butt off.... fighting the procrastination and the lack of discipline was hard.  It's still hard. I just didn't know back then that the procrastination was something that ran deep. It wasn't just a simple choice I made to not do my work.

So here I am as an adult still battling these things. I have the potential to be really freaking amazing at whatever I choose to do. I can't totally blame my lack of discipline for where I am today but it does play a big role. So if the way we were disciplined as children didn't quite work for us how do we discipline ourselves now? How do we teach ourselves? How do we hold ourselves accountable? How do we come up with consequences for ourselves?

When it comes to my nephews, if they misbehave or don't do something they were supposed to do I end up taking the video games away. When it gets really bad I may even take away the tv as well. Then I make them go outside to play... I'm no parent so who knows if what I'm doing is "right" or "wrong". But really when it comes to children we either take something away or put them in a time out. How do we translate that into adult situations?

If I don't finish my to-do list for the day I typically just let it go and feel kind of bad about it later while I'm watching Pretty Little Liars or Grey's Anatomy...  So what if I don't do what I'm supposed to do for the day? Should I not allow myself to watch tv that night? Ok...well I'll just read instead. Or should I finish the work then watch tv? If I don't keep my room picked up or do the dishes....am I not allowed to go out with my friends this weekend? Do I take a time out? How does this work? How do I "punish" myself for "misbehaving"? And who's to say that once I do come up with a system for myself that I'll actually keep up with it?

How do you hold yourself accountable?

♥